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2006-12-24 - 2.13am (urrrgh!!) previous entry next entry
Rocking, eating, tiny boy, and it's Christmas Eve!!
I can�t believe I wrote this TWO DAYS ago!! I never never do this � start an entry, and fail to finish it the same day. I hate even doing it and leaving it till the next day, but urgh, there has just been so much to DO somehow, and no time at all to get on the computer. I am so annoyed that I never finished it that same day, because now it�s Christmas Eve and everything is all about Christmas now. But I REALLY wanted everyone to know about this non-Christmas related news:
No, he�s not crawling, but it�s a big new thing for Mathie to be on his hands and knees, rocking away! I wrote about it a couple of days ago so I�ll copy and paste that from Word now. And then it�ll be too late to write any more, tsk. But I�ll just write a little bit more and then go to bed. I need to get some stuff written BEFORE Christmas! Because afterwards there will be loooads of Christmas stuff to write about! So here�s what I wrote a couple of days ago, including some photos and a video clip of Matthew rocking on his hands and knees from the second day he was doing it:
Sooo little time to make an update! Neil is off work from today till the New Year, yaaaaaaaaaaay!!!! I feel physically like I have relaxed my shoulders properly for the first time in months, seriously. I didn't expect to, even though I knew I was looking forward to him being around for an extended time, but I am WAY more relieved than I thought I'd be! :) Yay!
So, it's only 5.08pm and I nnnnever get to go on the computer when the boys are awake, but I have managed to convince Neil that it's a good idea that I get a brief (haha!) diary entry done NOW so that when the boys are asleep later, *I* can work on the mountain of urgent sewing projects that have been piling up for months, and HE gets to play his shoot-em-up computer game thingy that he's addicted to, instead of me needing to monopolise the computer for my diary - cunning, no? ;) So here I am in absolute bliss, typing away in my diary with both boys AWAKE and active downstairs, and yet NOT my responsibility right at this moment! It's so nice to have a breather during a normal active time of day. Neil is getting Arthur's tea ready, and I can hear Matthew chatting to toys on the floor.
Matthew is DESPERATE to crawl. I know I mentioned that before and he has been for a while, but his sense of frustration over it has really gone up a gear in the last few days or maybe even the last week. He is more cranky than usual on the floor, and gets cross and frustrated after only a short time there. I also think he's a bit bored with the type of toys he's playing with now, as they're all "baby" toys, and the boy is just itching to sit up and whizz cars around the garage that is more for toddlers like Arthur! He watches and I try to help him be involved as much as I can (and so does Arthur, bless him!), but he is just so frustrated by his body's lack of ability to DO things that he's interested in.
He is very mobile on his tummy, rolling and swivelling around and stuff at quite a fast speed, to get to anything he wants, but I know he wants to crawl and sit and DO things with his hands and feet properly. I think he hates having no control over his body. Oh my gosh, I think he is going to be like me! I am a BORN control freak. It's definitely in my family! And poor Matthew seems to be very similar in his personality. Arthur isn't like that, though he DOES like control of the situation - but then toddlers do, don't they?
Yesterday he and Arthur were playing with the magnetic cars that go with the garage. They are big and chunky and they rattle when you shake them. They are suitable for 12 months plus, so a nice toy for Matthew, as there are no small parts to worry about. They're bright coloured and he LOVES them. But he grapples at them so vigorously that they tend to whizz away from him out of his reach, and then he gets frustrated. I went upstairs while they were playing to get some washing to put in the machine, and when I got to the top of the stairs to come down again, I saw the red car right up against the stair gate, and Matthew was 2 feet away from it, head on. He was absolutely motionless, on all fours! He was staring at that car with such intensity and stayed still like that for so long that I wonder if he was trying to MAKE it come to him by will, haha! Arthur was playing on the other side of the room, oblivious to Matthew's new thing, which I was relieved about because I wanted to see what he'd do, undisturbed. I just stood there and held my breath! After a while he started rocking back and forth on his hands and knees, and then went still and bored through that car again with his laser beams, hehe! Then he rocked some more and then stared. Then Arthur noticed him and came running to give him the car - he's such a sweetheart. He cried out, "Oh no! Poor Ma-Ma, can't reach red car!" and came running to get it for him. Instinctively I stopped him because I wanted to give Matthew a chance to continue practising his thing, but I wish I hadn't really, because Arthur was being so lovely to do that and he got quite upset when I asked him not to. I had to cuddle him and explain that Matthew is about to learn to crawl and sometimes when he can't reach something it is a good idea for us to leave it for him to try and reach. I told Arthur that Matthew is practising on his hands and knees, trying to figure out how to crawl, and the more practise he gets, the sooner he will be able to crawl. Arthur understood I think, but he still used this sad pitiful voice and said, "Ah-yah get red car, Ma-Ma..." and so I let him get the car and give it to Matthew. And gave him lots of warm praise for it. He is such a total sweetie pea.
After that Matthew got bored of the car and got very cranky so I couldn't try to encourage him again or get the camcorder out or anything. But since then he has been going up onto all fours quite a lot, and rocking and rocking. This afternoon I took some footage of him rocking on his hands and knees while Neil took Arthur to the park for a run about. He gets into the position with total ease, in a second, which surprises me from out of the blue - having not even known how to make his body do that yesterday morning! I wonder if he'll be the type of baby who suddenly crawls across the room from nowhere at all?! Arthur wasn't like that at all, but Matthew is very different to him in the motor skills so far, so it's possible.
Here's a bit of the footage I took today:
Today when Matthew is on all fours, he seems to know he wants to move as well as be up there like that, because it's really obvious sometimes that he's trying to figure out or make his body DO the next thing, but he just doesn't know how, and he gets very frustrated. He freezes his position and does this weird wide-open-mouth, frowning frustrated face, like a silent scream but with no air coming out, and he stiffens his back like he WANTS the darn thing to DO something to move him! But then he relaxes and acts cross and cranky. Twice today he figured out that he can lift one arm and look at me with one hand up in the air with the other hand and his two knees on the floor at the same time. I know he just has to figure that if he puts that hand juuust a bit in front of where it was, when he puts it back on the floor, he could shuffle his knee forwards to line himself up right again, and then - wow, I MOVED! And then he probably won't look back. BUT, I am not holding my breath toooo much because Arthur was rocking on his hands and knees for ages before he actually crawled. He seemed much happier doing that for a while than Matthew is though, so perhaps Matthew is more motivated to get going than Arthur was. Anyway. It makes me nervous! I need to grow a few extra eyes, quick!
Matthew is doing great on his food! He has been having more banana and enjoying it immensely! The other day Arthur was having a little pouch of pureed apple (sold as a toddler food but it's just apple and vit C) and he wanted to "share appoo Ma-Ma" so after Matthew's banana was too slimy from being handled for him to hold any longer, I mashed it on the tray with some of Arthur's applesauce, and he enjoyed getting his hands mucky! He did feed himself a couple of fistfuls of the lumpy mixture though, and seemed to like it:
Before all that he had eaten just whole banana, and watched Arthur eat his applesauce, and so he had some nice sweet flavour from the banana. Here�s his face about 2 seconds after he had some apple puree, hehe!...
And here is Arthur being THRILLED to be allowed to actually feed Matthew with a spoon � Matthew was eager to let him too. He just adores Arthur. Of course Arthur did get so that he couldn�t decide whether to put the spoon in Matthew�s mouth or his own, after a while!...
Then the next day (four days ago, I think), Matthew moved on to a new food! He had parsnip for the first time!!! I roasted an organic one, but it was a bit disappointing because it was less flavoursome and yummy than the non-organic ones I usually get for Neil and myself. I have to admit, Matthew has since had a non-organic roast parsnip! He seemed happy enough with either though, and munched into them right away! Another first for Matthew that meal was the introduction of a sippy cup with water in it, as he was taking these HUGE chunks off the parsnip and trying to swallow them! He did a fair bit of gagging, but by the end of his meal he was doing a lot better already and swallowing large pieces or just spitting them back out, with less gagging than at the start. He really just needs practise, that�s all. It�s scary when he gags, and that�s when I caved with Arthur. I figured it must be dangerous so I stopped him eating the lumpy/solid thing in question (rice cakes, I think) for a couple of MONTHS! This time I keep reminding myself of the research I�ve done and how gagging isn�t dangerous, but an indication that the baby is practising learning to swallow. And it�s true, he really does improve as he tests his new skill out. He isn�t remotely panicked by the gagging, even with a bigger lump than he intended and watering eyes, gasping, etc. Once I whipped a piece of parsnip out of his mouth for him (not sure if I should have done that though) as it was rather large and he�d swished it right to the back of his mouth. He simply blinks the gagging tears away for a second, and then with eager eyes, looks back to the highchair tray, grabs another lump of food and rams it into his mouth! He seems perfectly happy and calm with eating big pieces of food, and isn�t put off at all by struggling over learning to swallow different textures, which is hugely reassuring for me. I think if he was upset about it, I�d find it almost impossible not to cave in and go to mushy food. But it�s fine :) Anyway so I figured he would be getting thirsty with all these big lumps of food, so I offered him a sippy cup with water and he was very eager to grab the handles and chew chew chewwwww on the soft-ish nozzle. When he realised water came out of it, he made a face, and looked at me for reassurance, but soon went back and tried again. He sucked it once or twice and got a proper drink, but mostly just chewed it. He did great! He can�t hold the sippy cup properly by himself, but as always with Matthew, he is eager to give it a go. Here he is with his first parsnip (already mushed by eager chewing!) and his first sippy cup of water!
This boy looks like he is going to be a happy eater :) I am thrilled about that, after the huge food-related palavas with Arthur! He isn�t hesitant or suspicious or unsure about any food so far, although I do realise he�s only had 3 different foods to date! It�s time to give him a new food again, and methinks I will hand him a chunk of roast chicken when we have Christmas dinner tomorrow. We�re not doing turkey because it seems a bit daft when there are only two of us eating it! Chicken�s fine by me, and easy peasy to do. Appropriately sized, also. Arthur won�t eat it. He won�t eat anything but baby food jars these days. Yes, you read right. *sigh* Not BABY baby food, but those toddler 15 months plus jars. I found one in the back of the cupboard a couple of weeks ago, some risotto thingy with beef and veg, and thought I might as well serve it up for Arthur to use it up, pretty sure that he would refuse it like everything else (with the exception of toast and marmite, peas, cereal, peas, raisins, peas, and � oh yes, peas!). But he LOVED it! He ate it nearly all up, and that meant for the first time in ages he got a meal that was 100% nutrious, fully balanced, organic, without salt, and DIFFERENT to the foods he�s been eating for ages. That was enough for me. Who cares about the whole �but it�s BABY food, and he�s TWO!� issue! Those foods are good and nutritious and he�ll EAT them. They have a good range of balanced meals. He likes me to make him extra peas (like a whole adult serving!) to go with it, even if it has peas in it already. He eats all the peas first, and often will leave whatever is left, but if the food is TEAMING with peas then he pretty much has to eat it all just to eat the peas, as it�s in a sauce. So he gets the good stuff and doesn�t complain! Yay! So, phooey. I went out and bought the whole range of those toddler meals and now he tucks into those happily again for tea, with extra peas. He�ll eat a yoghurt and some raisins for dessert as well. For lunch he has marmite on toast and maybe some banana or raisins, or an organic sugar-free gingerbread man, and I don�t have to worry about whether marmite on toast is going to be his most nutritious meal of the day or not, now that he�s back on the baby jars. I was all flappy about it at first, but my mum told me to stop. She said he�s eating nourishing food and that�s all that matters. Plus, it IS very very easy for me. Ready made, and 40 seconds in the microwave! Very handy for my current lifestyle! I think it�s quite likely that Arthur will start to take more interest in food when Matthew leads by example. I will make proper meals for Matthew as he moves from just single items of food, and if Arthur wants it, he will be welcome to have some too. I think if I just go with that laisse-faire attitude, he will be most likely to come around. He�ll see me not bothered with what he eats (from his point of view anyway!) and Matthew enjoying Mummy�s cooking, and hopefully he�ll start to take an interest and eat the food with Matthew. Until then, so long as he�s eating well, I�m not going to worry about it. He�s two, after all. But these food issues are just Arthur, and nothing to do with being two.
Okay that�s what I wrote!
I have noooo time to write about anything else really, but I�ll just quickly catch up on the weekend. I can�t believe it�s Christmas Eve already!!! Yesterday was Neil�s second day off work and he woke up with one of his headaches. He had to go back to bed at 9am and stayed there till 3pm, when he took Arthur for a short walk around the block to see if the air helped his head. It didn�t. He went back to bed and then helped settle Arthur into bed at bedtime, and stayed there till the next morning. I had this horrible split-personalities type of thing going on. Nice Me was thinking, �Oh my poor poor husband! He should rest and get some peace and quiet! I hope his headache goes away soon!� whilst Horrid Me was thinking, �Urgh, those ?%*$# headaches!! When do *I* get to have a break?! Why did I let myself believe I�d even get a real chance to rest for like the first time in the SIX months since I gave birth?! And how come he gets to go to bed for the entire #%%$! day when he gets a headache, and I have to suck it up and look after two small children for the entire day when *I* get one?! Why can�t he pull himself together and just put up with it?! Lucky sod getting to lie in bed all day, headache or no!�
Yuck. Horrid me. :(
But anyway, I guess I got over it, because the day didn�t go too badly with the boys. It just felt exactly like a day when Neil is at work, and once I got that into my head I was better about it I suppose. It did suck though. *I* want a darn break. When I�ve been genuinely too poorly to get up from my bed and Neil has been home, I have still had to do waaaay more than he has. He is fantastic with the boys, and I am very lucky. But I do still have the breasts and both my children breastfeed, and one of them relies on me to get to sleep. Neil is prone to bringing a cranky boy to me while I�m sleeping, and waking me up to say, �I don�t know if it�s because he�s hungry� when actually he isn�t hungry, but then I�m awake and need to deal with it. I just LONG for a big old block of unbroken sleep. I can�t remember when I last had one. It�s okay because with Matthew it is what I expected � he needs to feed at night and I am BLESSED to have the ability to give him nourishment from my own body! It�s wonderful snuggle time and I�ll be sad when it stops. But in the day when I get a rare chance to catch up on some sleep, I find it so frustrating to be woken after an hour or two just to see if Matthew might want to breastfeed when it has only been an hour or two since he last fed. He is fine to go 3 hours from his last feed, though if he�s cranky after 2 or 2 and a half I might see if he�s hungry, if I�m right there anyway. If he has to wait another half hour, he�s fine to do that. So I wish I could just be seen to be �away� until 3 hours have passed! I�d love to sleep 3 uninterrupted hours during the morning, say, on a Saturday, to help me catch up. I heart my morning sleep. I can manage way better without late evening sleep than I can without the same amount of sleep in the morning. I am NOT a morning person. I do great staying up late, and my brain seems to work best late at night. I used to do my homework very late, once I figured out that I could do it with the most ease and whip through it quickly too. I find it hard to wake up in the mornings even if I�ve had a LONG night of good sleep. It�s just the way I am. I�m lucky that Neil takes the boys when they wake in the morning so that I can sleep till he needs to get ready for work � it�s just an extra hour or so, but it�s worth it to me!
Anyway, on a less selfish note, Neil is now over his headache, and we�ve had a good day preparing for Christmas � our first Christmas as a little family unit all of our own! Arthur isn�t really old enough to know about Christmas yet, but we�ve been doing our best to tell him about it these last few days. I spent the last three evenings (five hours each time!) sewing the boys their own Christmas stockings! I just decided to do it last week. They didn�t need to have stockings at all, but I had some Christmas fabric left over from making Christmas nappy wraps for Arthur when he was still in my tummy, and some gold thread, and I got to thinking� So I embroidered their names on the top of their stockings in thick gold thread. There is gold sparkle on the fabric too :) Arthur says they are �pwetty� :) Tonight he helped me to hang them up in front of the Christmas tree. He chose the spot for his own one, and then Matthew�s. My parents used to have us put out a glass of sherry and a mince pie for Father Christmas, but we don�t have sherry in this household, and I don�t want to drink the stuff, so we decided to make Father Christmas�s snack something that we wouldn�t mind consuming ourselves!! ;) We decided on a cookie and some milk, American style :) So I took Arthur in the kitchen and put a cookie on a plate and explained that it was for Father Christmas in case he was hungry when he was delivering Arthur and Matthew�s presents. I told him Father Christmas might be thirsty too, so how about we leave him a glass of milk? Arthur shook his head solemnly and said, �No milk. Juice!� So Father Christmas got left a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice instead ;) Perhaps that will be our own tradition! At the last minute we added a carrot for the reindeer :) Now, not to burst the Christmas bubble, but I have to say, I had trouble eating my dinner tonight after doing my job as Father Christmas and his carrot-happy reindeer, hehe! I can also tell you that Father Christmas had to have a top up of orange juice ;) I left a nibbled stump of carrot and a large crumb or two of cookie, just for the effect. And a little orange juice in the bottom of the glass. It was so much fun!!!! It�s the first time I�ve ever been the parent in this situation! It�s the most fun that Christmas Eve has been in YEARS! Since I was a child, even! We wrapped presents this evening, and filled the boys� stockings and laid out the other presents around the stockings and the tree. I took photos. I couldn�t help myself, and it�s not even Christmas Day with the boys awake yet!! *sigh*
Just after Arthur went to bed this evening:
After my work was done, hehe:
After we finished wrapping and laying things out:
I switched all the lights out to come up and write my diary before going to bed, and I just got captivated by that Christmas tree thing again. I just love to sit and gaze at a Christmas tree all lit up, in the dark. It�s magical, somehow. It makes me feel seven years old again, and it�s a lovely feeling! I gazed at the tree for ages and then finally turned the tree lights off and came upstairs to bed. Not before I took a photo in the dark though � I wanted to see how it would come out.
I love Christmas!!! I forgot how much! I am so excited about when my kids are a year or two older and REALLY into Christmas. I can�t wait to re-live that part of my childhood by seeing them go through it, and playing my part in the story as a parent. What fun! I hope everyone has a lovely Christmas! I am going to try to find time over the holidays to catch up on diaries that I have been missing for a long while. I am excited to read how other families have enjoyed Christmas together! Especially the little ones that I have been reading about since they were born (or earlier, in some cases!). Merry Christmas everyone! I�ll be back to write about our quiet family Christmas (though we�re hoping to attempt a 1-hour car journey to Neil�s sister (and Ella!) on Boxing Day) in a day or so, I should think. There should be some video clips and photos :) Now I am going to bed. It�s stupidly late (2am, ugh!). Night night!
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